Little Story

I have to write a short story using this-
You buy a potato from the store and when you bring it home it talks to you, tries to kill you, and then some freaky guy tells me that I have to leave and never return, but I see him a couple years later.
Okay. Well. I was not expecting a talking potato when I came home. The thing was sitting right there saying "Hello Fell!" and I was like "My name isn`t Fell, jump in the stew ya idiot." and he says "Well sure it is." and then jumps at me with a potato launcher and a knife. My first reaction was busting out laughing, until he cut my hand. So I was all like weirded out and stuff, and then a freaky guy jumps into my house THROUGH THE WINDOW and I was like "Dude, what the heck, theres a door!" and he jumps on my couch, looks at the potato and calls out "They don`t call me the steward for nothing." By that time I think I had died laughing but Steward killed the potato and told me to never ever return and I tried to protest but he didn`t care and vanished into thin air. So I meet him a couple years later and I say "Hey, Steward!" and the man goes, "Do I look like I can afford a plane ride right now?" THE END